We experience many losses in our lifetime.
The loss of family members, friends and loved ones. The loss of a much-loved pet. The loss of jobs. The loss of hopes or expectations. The loss of health. The loss of our youth and coming to terms with ageing.
Loss is an inevitable part of life, and grief is a natural part of the healing process. Every loss, however small or large, is valid and how you feel is valid also.
With all of their good intentions family and friends will wish “to cheer you up” and have you get back to normal life, which is sometimes not an option.
All too often we are told that we 'should have got over it by now' or that it's time we moved on.
How does Counselling help in Grief and Loss?
Professional help can make all the difference at this time.
Even with ‘normal’ grief, a counselor will help you process the loss in a safe, therapeutic and lasting way so that in time you can move on and start living again.
There are many further ways in which counseling provides the professional help you need.
Grieving is different for everyone and what assists each individual will be completely personal to you.
A Counsellor who feels deeply for what you are going through but and has a deep understanding for the natural stages and waves of grief is able to hold a safe space for you.
We accompany you in your grieving which will allow the grief to run its course in as ‘healthy’ a way as possible.
Remember that dealing with a significant loss can be one of the most difficult times in life.
How you ‘process’ loss - how you make meaning of it and decide to move through it- plays an important part in your emotional and mental health.
There will be a sense of realistic but genuine hope for the future.
Different Types of Loss
Feelings of loss are very personal, and only you know what is significant to you.
Such losses can include:
Subtle or less obvious losses can also cause strong feelings of grief, even though those around you may not know the extent of your feelings.
Some examples include:
Sudden versus Predictable Loss
There is no way to prepare for some kinds of events. They can challenge our sense of security and confidence in the predictability of life. They may produce physical symptoms such as sleep disturbance, nightmares, depression, social isolation, or mild or severe anxiety.
Predictable losses, like those due to illness, sometimes allow a person more time to prepare for the loss and process it.
How Long Does Grief Last?
The answer to that question really is as long as it takes.
The length of the grief process is different for everyone. Although it can be quite painful at times, the grief process should not be rushed and has no fixed time frame.
It is important to be patient with yourself as you experience your unique reactions to the loss. With time and support, things generally do get better. However, it is quite normal for anniversary dates, holidays, or other reminders, to trigger emotions and feelings and memories.
Taking care of yourself and having a strategy for these times, seeking support of friends and professionals, and acknowledging your feelings can help you cope.